Thursday, January 11, 2007

I know I promised, but...

...this is just too absurd to pass up.

In the midst of my cat's woes (and my cat woes), Metro thought he'd be helpful, and sign me up to a cat-related newsletter.

The first one wasn't too bad. "Does your cat have nine lives?":
I asked one of our writers to do a little research and tell us about this ancient proverb.
Okay. Cool.

Yesterday, I got another: "Can you read your cat's mind?"

"Okay. A cat psychology thing," I thought to myself. But then I went to the site and found:
Step 1. Believe in your psychic ability.
"Warning! Warning!" My bs-detector went off like a claxon.

Then there was the one this morning: "What's your cat's sign?"

Gadzooks.

Lori

6 comments:

  1. Using my psychic ability, I am autokeying--that is, I am directing the cats' thoughts through my fingers to the keyboard:

    EAT. Eat. Tuna. Eat EAT Eat cheese. Cheese Tuna eat.

    LICK CROTCH VIGOROUSLY. Lick lick lick lick lick lick lick lick lick lick lick.

    Tuna?

    *

    Sleep ...

    Oh--sorry. Must have been picking up psychic interference from the next commentor.

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  2. Anonymous3:30 PM

    Wow, that is truly amazing! How do you do it?

    IH

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  3. Anonymous8:28 PM

    If you could read your cats' minds, you wouldn't need to ask them what their signs are.

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  4. PJ -- Exactly! What are they thinking?!?

    Metro & IH -- nuts, the two of you.

    :p

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  5. Anonymous11:26 PM

    Metro, I thought you said you were gonna post the cat's thoughts? We're still waiting!

    PS: right now I'm in a house that has an etiquette book for cats, a "how to serve your cat better" (I'm thinking with a good Beaujolais) and every single one of the cards they got for Christmas has a cat on it except for the one I gave them, which has a drunken Santa. They probably WRITE that newsletter.

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  6. Ah--see. I knew it was from one of the commentors. Nice to see you here, Raincoaster.

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