Oh! Our house pictures are offline...

'Cause it's listed as "sold"!







So, I thought I'd post a couple of pictures.

The house.






And part of the back yard with the deck.











And the back of the garage (which Metro is super-excited about) with the play gym. (Okay, yes. The play gym is hopelessly pre-mature, but we're hoping our friends with kids will come out and take advantage of it!)



This is the 'up the road' view of the street...and up the road about a kilometre, it ends in a Par 3 golf course. Notice the bus stop across the street...only 5 routes in town (and one of those is the night time bus, one the weekend, lake-to-lake shuttle), and one stops outside our door. It's only 2 km to downtown, shorter if you take the shortcut along the creek, which can be found at the end of the little cul-de-sac to the left there.


Here's the creek:









And the view heading back into the centre of town, looking across the valley:








So, come and visit. We've already got three bookings for the summer (including the person I'm bribing to come help me unpack!), but if you bring a tent, there will be room for all!

Lori

You know you've done the right thing when...

Yes, it's all happened fast. Metro and I have married, honeymooned, packed, sold, moved, bought -- essentially begun anew...all in the space of two months.

How do you know you've done the right thing? Yeah, it may seem like it has all come together rather swimmingly, but...

Then Metro's boss sends him a link to an apt article. 'Apt' because he's having a hard time reconciling himself to my acres of books (where are they going to go in the new house?),and this is an article about owning, and moving, books:

"At the end of the day, and despite my own self-recriminations (all this money, all this effort, and to what end?), perhaps a personal library needs no justification. What's the alternative, after all? Outside these book lined walls, there's nothing but confusion. The culture at large has set itself directly against the slow, contemplative rigors and pleasures of reading."

But what is really remarkable is that my husband is now in a profession where people read, write, and discuss ideas.

THAT has been worth all of the stress.

Lori

More big changes!

Well, Metro and I have put in an offer on a house, and it has been accepted. We are now underway...

A house! If the deal is completed as planned, we will take possession June 28th.

We have had the busiest 2 months -- married, moved, employed, and now housed! And we managed to slip a trip to Paris in there as well...

I mean, how impressive is that?

Lori

No scandals to report

I hate to disappoint my loyal readers, but I have no scandals to report. Yet.

But I now have the inside track to this community -- I am officially the new manager for the Penticton Farmers' Market. Part of the community, no longer the outsider...what a difference it makes to one's perspective!

Not to mention other people's perceptions of me!

I'll keep you all posted.

Lori

A Penticton Update

A moment to write...at the beautiful new Penticton Tourist Information Centre. Convenient, free Internet access for the likes of me.

So, here's a quick synopsis of our life so far:

• Metro is really enjoying his job. His first week was, I believe, more than he had hoped for. He wrote, he edited, he contributed ideas, he bonded with his new co-workers.
• The rental market is unbelievably tight right now. May is the month that the people who spend their winters in the motels hunt out any apartments. I'm hunting any apartment. It's a little scary how white trash some of the places are that I'm having to consider.
• The buying market is better -- I'm looking forward to getting into it, probably sooner than I expected, just because of the rental market.
• We are living in a partial basement suite...not a full kitchen. Comfortable, furnished, convenient enough, and we can stay there until the beginning of June.
• I'm networking like a mad fool -- found us that basement suite, made connections with some of the festivals in town, got an invite to a Rotary meeting...and applied for a job managing the local Farmer's Market.
• The cats are fine -- and may even be getting used to the sudden changes in location. Or, at least, the hiding-under-the-bed time is getting shorter.

So, the adventure continues. I'm a little uncomfortable with our living situation in Limbo, but that should clear up soon.

More soon.

Lori

Paris...the fourth installment

Okay. I'm back for one last kick at the blogger can before I pack the computer. At the moment, the next couple of weeks are a little up in the air, quasi Limbo-esque, so please be patient.

Today's theme is Art & Life.

Metro and I visited L'espace Dali in Montmartre. If you get the chance...well, to be in Paris...go to this museum (even though it's not on the Museum Pass).

To the right is a piece of Dali's mirror art. Very cool.

The best thing to spend your money on in Paris, besides the cheese and wine, is the Museum Pass. Anecdotal evidence of its fabulousness:

• During my first visit to Paris, I had a leisurely lunch around the corner from Musee d'Orsay, then wandered past the 40-minute lineup to enter at the gift shop entrance.
• I discovered my favourite museum (the oft-mentioned Museum of the Middle Ages) in Paris by toodling past, checking it on the list ("Yup, it's included!") and going in.
  
• I visited the Louvre on Easter weekend, this time bypassing a lineup that meandered around the pyramid, and into the next courtyard -- at least a 2-hour definition of hell -- by popping into the side entrance on the Richelieu side (in the underpass from Rue de Rivoli). Visit the Louvre on a couple of different days, and relieve the pressure of trying to see it all at once.
• On this visit, I was able to slip into the Sainte-Chapelle an extra time to sit and watch the looks of wonder appear on people's faces as they climbed out of that medieval stairwell.
• Climb the towers of Notre Dame. See the archeaological dig under the Notre Dame plaza. Climb l'Arc de Triomphe.
• Don't wait in line at Versailles.

And we of course visited the musee d'Orsay -- the mecca for lovers of Impressionists and Post-Impressionists (on the Museum Pass).

Some art-lovers in the larval stage.







My "Name the Toulouse Lautrec Painting" Contest -- Which painting features this wacky detail?









And if you go to Paris and do not visit the Rodin Museum, you have missed one of the most amazing experiences of your life. And, as an added bonus, it's included on the Museum Pass. (Have I mentioned the Museum Pass?)

Here is his infamous statue of Balzac (apologies for the lighting). And here, a detail from his Gates of Hell.



















Next is not really Art -- or is it? The Pantheon is a wonderful building...full of pomp, history, and dead famous people. And home to Foucault's Pendulum.

Not worth the price of admission though, really...unless of course you have the Museum Pass, then it's utterly cool.







And, what you've all been waiting for, Metro himself, in what I think is a brilliant tourist shot of the awe inspired by la Sainte-Chapelle:
He's reading the card provided that tries to tell you about the stained glass -- "in the third lancet, on the eight level...."




What? You can't quite see his face? Okay, here is Mr. Cowfish himself, as we walk up our street towards the Seine, and our apartment.

Here is what he notices -- a picture he took of truck parking (the sign & the reality).


And my favourite tourist shot of all...me, buying a book from a vending machine. How cool is that?!?











Whew! Well, I don't know when I'll be blogging again, but it shouldn't be too long of a wait. Leave comments, and maybe I'll be inspired to come back sooner!

On to our new life in Penticton!

Talk to you soon.

Lori

Paris...the third installment

My...obsession is with Gothic cathedrals. Earlier, I ranted on about the Medieval era, and how it appealed to me. Obviously, the peasants worked hard, lived short, probably rather dull lives, but their spiritual lives were clear -- the Church existed. The utter simplicity of their belief system is a little staggering -- too tired, too illiterate, too poor to investigate options, question authority, make choices. Communities would work for their whole lifetimes on a cathedral, and not be bothered that they, or their grandchildren, might never see it completed. (Read Ken Follett's The Pillars of the Earth for a great story of the community around the building of a cathedral.)

So, today I'm going to blog about cathedrals.

We were down the street from Notre Dame de Paris...so it appears in many photos. ("Oh, another picture of Notre Dame?" Metro would ask)

Here I am (yes, me!), in a classic tourist shot from the bridge leading to l'Ile Saint-Louis. Isn't it pretty? (This is not the only shot Metro took of me with Notre Dame -- a man should always understand where his competition lies.)


And how can one resist flying buttresses?!? A closer shot around the apse of Notre Dame de Paris, with her lovely flying buttresses.

If you didn't know, flying buttresses (I just love the sound of that phrase: Flying buttresses! Flying buttresses! Flying buttresses!) were an architectural invention that rose out of the invention that created the architectural era that has been termed 'Gothic' -- the pointed arch. A pointed arch could hold up more weight than a barrel, or rounded arch. Architects of the time exploited this by building higher and higher...until they realized that while the peak of the arch would hold the weight, the walls tended to buckle out -- so they had to buttress them up. Now, tourists don't really care about the peaked arches, just the flying buttresses.

Or they don't know what they're looking at when the walk inside of Notre Dame and think: "Wow."

Oh, and a casual photography tip. Don't use a flash on on cathedral interiors, especially stained glass. If you are a total point'n'shoot kind of person with a camera, learn how to turn the flash off, keep the camera still (brace your elbows against something), and see what happens.

As an added bonus, it's respectful in a church, and does not damage art in an art gallery.

Do not get me started on stupid tourists and flashes in churches, or flashes on thousand-year-old pieces of art. ARGH!!



But, anyway. I've climbed the towers at Notre Dame twice now. Well-worth it. A classic shot of a chimera looking over the city.

Eugene Viollet-le-Duc undertook restorations of Notre Dame in the mid-1800s, and added the chimera gallery, to look over and protect the city.








I also like the view the other way.


We also went out to Chartres, an hours train trip from Gare Montparnasse. Notre Dame de Chartres, as I mentioned in an earlier post, has the most complete collection of medieval stained glass.

The beauty of Chartres is that it is a small town, and you can see how the cathedral would have looked, rising above the land, reminding everyone of their place in the greater scheme of things, in the 1200s. (Goofy pic of me, but a great one of the cathedral on its hill.)





We were in Chartres on a rather dismal day, so my outdoor pictures are rather dark. I'm not going to go into how influential this cathedral was in its design -- but most people notice the two very different spires. The simpler one on the right is the older one. [You can, of course climb up the tower -- the left one actually. I did it 4 years ago, and with my cold, didn't feel up to it this time around. Took some great pictures then, that are in black & white on my wall.]

Inside of the cathedral is dark and cold, mostly because the city doesn't have the massive funding it needs for all of Notre Dame de Chartre's upkeep. She is in need of some major restoration.

This picture is of small side altar at the transept (or crossing), near the beginning of the ambulatory (the curved hallway that goes around the outside of the apse). [I think I was leaning against a pillar to steady myself for this shot.]


I sat in the chairs and steadied my camera on the back of the chair in front to get this picture of the nave.

You can feel weight of time and the stone in this quiet, cold, dark place. This should be a pilgrimage site for everyone whose culture is based on the Western European medieval Christianity. I'm personally agnostic, but this place still hits me in a deep part of my psyche...must be the weight of history, untainted by the trappings of tourism.




One final picture for today...a section of the labyrinth on the floor of Notre Dame de Chartres. The bulk of it is covered by chairs, but adherents used to walk this pattern in reflective prayer, sometimes on their knees.

Thanks for listening. Your comments, by the way, are greatly appreciated.

Lori

Paris...the second installment

I took so many pictures in Paris...it's difficult to choose the ones to post. This visit, I took more commentary shots, more 'arty' shots, and yes, because Metro was with me, more touristy shots. And he even took the camera, or asked me to take something specific at times. (Since he bought the camera for me, I guess I shouldn't complain!)

Okay, so on to the photos. First off, some commentary. Here we have what I like to call my bling greyhounds. A matching set of dogs, with matching bling-studded, blue collars. (Lori-watchers, take note of my first use of that annoying neologism, 'bling'. It took some rather cute, spoiled dogs to do it, but I've use it!)

Parisian dogs...they come in all sizes. Parisian dog owners...they come in all types. Some even pick up after their pooch. And some of les chiens de Paris are fed some really weird stuff, from the evidence.





It was in Paris in 2002 that I saw my first Smart car. Wow, it was so cute, so small! Since then, I've ridden in one, and they are becoming a common sight on the streets of Vancouver. This is good.

If you can't read the printing on the side of the car, it says: "2.5 metres of parking pleasure for 5.50 Euros a day."



And, my fave new thing this trip...the space-cycle. Okay, I don't know what they're really called, but how cool is this thing?!? Note the seat belt. You can't see on this picture, but there is a passenger seat on the back, on the outside of the thing.

Hmm. Not as romantic a ride as on the back of a regular motorcycle...

[Note also, Notre Dame de Paris in the background. This was on the corner of our block.]



One day, we took the metro to Porte de Clignancourt, and the enormous, 15-acre Marche de Puce (Flea Market).

On the outskirts, you've got the people who set up on the sidewalks and side streets, capitalizing on the shoppers headed to the heart of the district. It is a warren of streets and alleys with pretty much everything for sale.



And cemetaries.

I had a bit of a pilgrimage to undertake, at the Pere Lachaise Cemetary (follow the link, it is [after a bit of playing around] the bestest virtual tour I've ever seen...you can actually walk through the graveyard, or search for famous graves. Cool. ). You see, in 2002, I had visited the tomb of Alain Kardec, the spiritualist (all of the best sites I could have linked to were in Portuguese, there is a large Brazilian spiritualist movement). Supposedly, if you wish on his grave, and your wish comes true, you must bring flowers to him. Well, over 3 years ago, I made some kind of last-ditch, hey-I'm-getting-on-in-years-here, romantic wish...and 6 months later I met Metro. So we had to leave flowers for Kardec.

Also at Pere Lachaise: Heloise and Abelard, Chopin, Wilde, Balzac, Colette, Isadora Duncan...the list goes on and on...down to the most insignificant grave stone which is probably the most visited: Jim Morrison (the one with the flowers).

And don't forget Victor Noir, a journalist, whose tomb is a life-size version of himself, fully clothed. Women rub a certain part of his anatomy for fertility luck...

Whew! More another day. I have to go pick up a load of boxes, and start culling (sob!) and packing my books.

Lori

An activist and a poet

A soft-spoken piece of political poetry from Woody.

Enjoy.

Lori

Paris...the first installment

First of all, if anyone you know is going to Paris, tell them to rent an apartment. It was the best decision we made -- contributed to the wonderful time we had by saving us money, and adding comfort to the stay. We ate in at least once a day -- we were close enough to, well, everything, that we even wandered home for lunch once or twice.

So, "How on Earth do I find an apartment in Paris?" I hear you ask. Ah, recommendations. Friends of ours used www.an-apartment-in-paris.com -- I misheard (actually, I didn't have a pen), so when I got home, I typed in www.my-apartment-in-paris.com -- which worked just as well!

Two caveats. First, space is at a premium in Paris, especially in the very central areas. We saw a tiny studio (something ridiculously small, like 15 square metres) being sold for 300,000 euros in the 5th arrondissment. Expect the actual space to be smaller than the photos. Secondly, everyone in Paris smokes, everywhere. [I have had friends who will walk into an old pub here in Vancouver, that has been non-smoking for ages, and say: "I can't go in there, someone has smoked in there! I can smell it!" These people should not go to Paris. If you know some, dissuade them from going. They will not enjoy themselves.] A non-smoking apartment probably means it's had new paint to try to cover up the smell of centuries of smoking. Trust me, you'll still smell smoke.



That said, our apartment was in a building along the Seine, in the 5e arrondissment. This chimera atop of Notre Dame de Paris is pretty much looking right at it (past the second bridge in the photo, almost to the next bridge, Pont Neuf, which isn't in the picture).






This is what we saw, coming out of the building in the morning. The bouquinistes across the street (they line the Seine in this area, selling old books, prints, postcards, comics, etc.)...and that's the Louvre, along to the left.




We were staying on Quai des Grands Augustins, which intersected right next to us with the Rue des Grands Augustins. Just to prove to us that there is no escape from history in Paris, we found this a week into our stay, on a building that essentially backed on to ours, around the corner.
[If you can't read this plaque, it says "Pablo Picasso lived in this building from 1936 to 1955. It was in this studio that he painted 'Guernica' in 1937. It is also equally where Balzac located the action of his book "Le Chef d'Oeuvre Inconnu" (the unknown painter? artist? I should look it up)]

Okay, so Metro and I visited cathedrals, churches, and chapels. Of course. Travel to Europe and you can't avoid them. The difference is, I'm a Gothic architecture junkie, and it thrilled me to see Notre Dame every day, to hear the bells as we walked home in the evening...and to take pictures of the stained glass. This is a window in one of the apse chapels at Notre Dame (the figure in the bottom left is a statue).

This picture is in the jewel of la Sainte Chapelle, in the Palais de Justice, which was literally right across the Seine from us.












And this last picture, for today (actually this morning, it's 2 a.m., and I'm having trouble sleeping because of my clogged sinuses...and yes, it did hurt like hell on the plane trip home!) is from the Museum of the Middle Ages, a piece of stained glass from some unnamed church somewhere...Samson having his eye gouged out:




Okay, yuck.


That's all for now. More will come soon. Keep coming back!

Lori

Medieval Life

Yesterday, we took a break from les musées de Paris, and hopped on a train to Chartres. The Cathedral there is spectacular, and famous for its glass...the largest collection of 12th Century stained glass in the world. There's even a guy there with the fabulous self-created role of in-town-expat-expert on the Cathedral, Malcolm Miller. (I'm not a big fan of tours, so I didn't look him up. I have, though, read his book, which I bought last time I was here!)

Notre Dame de Chartres is a dusky, dark and dramatic mountain of stone that instills a sense of wonder in the mere mortals wandering the aisles. Awe-inspiring does not begin to express it.

Then this morning, Metro and I visited La Sainte Chapelle -- literally a gem of a church...smaller than the larger cathedrals, it consists mainly of traceries of stone to envelop the brilliant glass. Visitors begin in the lower level, which is pretty, and then climb the tightly winding staircase to come out into the middle of the breathtaking upper chapel. You limit yourself to awed whispers here.

So, there we were, shivering in the cold of these lofty stone edifices, and I tried to imagine what it would have been like for us 800 years ago...

Wrapped in all of your winter clothes, you stand in the great nave of the church, between the enormous stone pillars, under the vaulted ceiling, in the light of the coloured glass and a few torches. Your life is your work and your religion, but you can't read. The statuary and the glass are your visual Book of God, interpreted for you by the holy few who can read....

I can't imagine it. In Victor Hugo's The Hunchback of Notre Dame, he goes off on a lovely rant about how literacy will destroy architecture -- essentially that if the need does not exist to instill the stones with the whole of a belief system, then architecture is reduced to merely providing shelter.

Well, it happened. It is here that my literacy ends.

Lori

Another Day, Une Autre Museé

Well...what have we done so far except eat cheese, drink wine, and browse museums?

• We met a bartender who sold a roll of toilet paper on eBay for 8 euros.
• We received a bottle of champagne on the plane to Europe because of our "Just Married" pins a friend gave us.

I'm writing without my first coffee of the morning...so my inspiration is low.

hmmm....cheese....wine....

We have a 4-day museum pass, and our plan has yet to include the Louvre. Next week. Today is Les Invalides, Rodin's Museum, and probably La Ste. Chapelle. Tomorrow we go to Le Marais area, and see the Pompidou Centre (with the Museum of Modern Art) and Picasso.

Cemeteries on the weekend.

I'll try to keep you posted.

Lori

Stunned silence

Well, Metro got the job. We're moving.

No. First we're getting married on Saturday. It's two sleeps away, as my sister keeps calling to tell me. (I'll answer the phone to hear her say "Six more sleeps!" or "Four more sleeps!" Cute, but irritating.)

Oh, and then we're off to Paris for a 10-night stay. Which means I've got to clean house, pack...

Then, we come home, Metro gives notice at his current job, and all hell breaks loose. He'll be working during the days (at a labour-intensive job, so he'll come home tired), and so will I. Culling, sorting, packing, planning...

And then to Penticton. A big change from Vancouver.

The only absurdity today is how busy life is going to be once we get home. And as there will be nothing I can do while in Paris...I will blithely eat cheese, view Art, drink wine, and wander the streets in an appreciative daze, holding my husband's hand.

So, bear with me until life finds its new track -- I may not have much chance to blog.

Wish me luck! (or sanity...)

Lori

Karma

I read Nag's entry on ruthless culling the other day, and thought it was funny. "Better her than me," I thought smugly.

Ah, I pay. (Not I pinch. That's something different.)

Yesterday, Metro and I woke up at O'dark-stupid, and toodled out to Penticton (a good 5 hours away), to his job interview -- a job that would have him working in his chosen field, and require us to move, should he get it.

So now, I'm looking at my own mess (and my own packrat-itis), and wondering what kind of madness I'll be coming home to after my honeymoon...

Lori

some old faves!

Found a couple of old comics clipped out and saved at least 15 years ago. Since they were deteriorating, I thought I'd scan and post them here, for others to enjoy.

This is a Bizarro, I believe:
That still makes me laugh.

The next one is so truly true, I've referred to it numerous times in the past:


Now others can grin along with me.

Lori

A Rebirth

Readers and fans (not the same thing!) of the Terminal City blog, disappointed that the Diary-x server took a flying leap off a cyber-cliff in the Netosphere, will be pleased to note the resurgence of the Evil Elf's blog as raincoaster.

Read at your own risk, as she re-invents herself in an all new space.

Enjoy!

Lori

Flight No-shows

The other day, a friend commented on the number of people who were no-shows on the day of the flight. I was appalled. Imagine, planning a trip, booking a flight, paying for it, and then letting the travel date just slip past!

Perhaps my reality slipped in there. I'm a budget flyer. I plan carefully, end up with special deals, non-refundable tickets -- and go on my trips. (I've also heard of people who don't quite read their tickets, and arrive at the airport after the plane has left, or go the next day....but that's a different post!)

So, in preparation of a rambling blog post on the silliness of people who pay for trips and don't go, I did a bit of searching -- and discovered that it's more the trickiness of people who get their travel agents to book two different flights, to keep their options open. Then there are the people trapped in traffic, or subject to faulty alarm clocks (6 a.m. flights have higher no-show rates, as do flights "scheduled around Chicago rush hours").

If you're one of those people who hopes to be bumped, read these tips. But, you should also read this interesting article on how airlines are reducing the number of no-shows, and thus the over-booking rates...and then, of course, the number of people who can volunteer to give up their seats for great goodies! (Then there is this article that contradicts some of what the first one says about what the airlines are 'required' to do for passengers they've bumped.)

I have no intention of being late for our honeymoon trip to Paris. Metro found tickets so cheap on Yahoo travel that people have asked us if it's 'on a real airline'...yes it is. We do have to leave from Seattle, stay in a hotel, park the car for the 10 days we're gone...but it's all an adventure.

Lori

How much time did this take?

A little video of Einstein the Parrot.

Oh, it's cute and all, but all I could think of was this woman's life: devoted to training and touring with a parrot.

Is it worth it?

Lori

What is the magic formula?

Have you ever wondered how "they" figure out how many restaurants any given community can support? I've heard that McD's has an actual formula...

A formula probably exists for every form of critical mass:

• How many people need to arrive at a house party before people end up having a mini-party in the kitchen. (A good dozen?)
  
• How many cats does a woman need before becoming a 'crazy cat lady'. (More than 5? or 3?)
  
• How many of any one item can you have before it is a collection. (A friend of mine says, very definitively: "Four.")

The important one for the work that I do is the number of volunteers/workers before someone becomes dissatisfied because they are under-utilized. Volunteers are an interesting breed -- they will work for free, but they do want...a useful task, acknowledgement, self-satisfaction, and opportunities for self-improvement.

I became a member of Bzzagent dot com (you know something? I have no desire to link to them) awhile ago, and at first flush it is a great concept: Use human beings' innate desire to know about something first and tell other people about it for marketing purposes...the company makes money, and their work force is all willing volunteers. Oh, they give rewards based on a point system -- and it is quite generous, if you are offered bzzagent campaigns.

The problem is, I think they've reached critical mass. A lot of recent publicity has them signing up new Bzzagents like crazy, but it hasn't brought in the same proportion of new clients. If you read their company blog, all is transparent and wow-aren't-we-wonderful, but if you read the comments from the actual agents, you'll see a lot of people who are dissatisfied.

No, not just people -- volunteers who are the backbone of their concept, the product that they sell to clients, and the audience for all of their fabulous self-congratulatory promotions.

The formula is now reversed...

How many is too many?
How soon before the volunteers give up waiting to be used?
How much bad publicity will they end up getting? (probably not enough to make any difference)

Lori

Burn your letters!

Just received my birthday present to myself in the mail today: The Bukowski/Purdy Letters 1964-1974 (edited by Seamus Cooney).

{Rule #3 in life...always buy yourself a birthday present, then you're guaranteed to get the one thing you actually want.}

I am a fan of Charles Bukowski's poetry, and Al Purdy's...it was a delight to find that this book existed. I requested it from Powells.com over a year ago, and voila! they found a copy in time for my birthday!

Anyway, here's part of Al Purdy's foreword:

"I am, of course, writing this because the publisher wants me to. I can't think of any other reason. This Buk-Purdy thing was a private correspondence, which neither of us expect to see in public, gossiping away like a dumb loudspeaker. I do confess, it makes me a little morose, the way I don't feel when I have lost myself in poems. I hope nobody likes me for it, but someone may be slightly interested."

Reminds me of the title of the collected Robertson Davies correspondence, For Your Eyes Alone (2000) -- published after his death of course. Also reminiscent of Virginia Woolf, who, I believe, asked Leonard in her suicide note to burn her diaries.

In my diaries, I usually write to myself-in-the-future, not some unsuspected/ing public. My letters, when I go back and read them later, are such a mess of triviality that I'm surprised my correspondent even responded...But I'm lucky. I have no pretensions of becoming a famous writer.

To those of you with a desire to be famous: Publish your own letters and diaries (a la Anais Nin), or burn them yourself...don't expect your heirs to do the latter for you.

And to those of you who forget to do it -- your adoring public will devour your spelling mistakes and inanities with love and reverence.

Lori

I'm with Wiarton Willie!

Big news today: Wiarton Willie (in Ontario) & Shubenacadie Sam (in Nova Scotia) both agree that we're due for an early spring this year. Punxsutawney Phil (in Pennsylvania), unfortunately saw his shadow.

I'll add my vote to the other Canadians, and let the US groundhogs fend for themselves. Being born on February 2nd gives me the right to check for my shadow like the my fellow groundpigs.

But I won't mention that I was up and out before the sun today...it is just undeniably unfair that the Lower Mainland gets a sunny day today, of all days!!

Ah well. Off to celebrate my birthday!

Lori

So cute...but would I wear it??

From the Spiky Bras Boutique:

I can't imagine any comment I could make...

Lori

Here's a dilemma for you today...

Random stumbling about the wonders (and silliness) of the Internet today found me this article from the Philosophers' Magazine Online.

Anyway, the author (Daniel C. Dennett) of this article asks the question (to paraphrase): Should people who are being deceived for their own good be told? His focus is on the context of religion, but it is a question applicable to many common situations:

Should the sweet old lady in the nursing home be told that her son has just been sent to prison? Should the awkward 12-year-old boy who wasn't cut from the baseball team be told about the arm-twisting that persuaded the coach to keep him on the squad?

But to simplify his essay to this one concept is to do him a disservice. I'm merely distilling one idea that made me think: "Whoa, Nellie!"

The point is: if you want to have your brain twisted around a moral quandary, read this article.

Draw a pig personality test

Here's my pig. I think he's quite cute. And, if you read down the page, you'll get an analysis of my personality, based on how I drew this little piggy on a computer screen.

Ah well. I'm sure there are better things to do with my time. So, I'll go do them, while you're drawing your pig.

Lori

Feminist Ephiphany in the Middle Stall

Last night was a great one -- the Evil Elf and I put on our monthly literary gathering, known as the Shebeen Club (because our home is the Shebeen Whisk(e)y House, and our hope is to be the next Algonquin Roundtable), but this one was different.

A few weeks before, our scheduled presenter bailed on us, so we had decided to go back to the original format -- a dead celebrity. Hemingway's birthday, James Joyce & Bloomsday, Bukowski's Hangover (our day fell the day after his birthday...seemed apt)...we'd covered the men, but now here was an opportunity: January 17, 2006 was the 176th birthday of Anne Bronte.

Suddenly, the plan was now that I would present a discussion with the group on the evolution of Feminist literature. I planned to focus on Feminist SF as a way of showing the evolution on a smaller scale, and because it used to be a passion of mine.

At first blush, the evening last night looked like a bit of a bust. Start time came and went, and we had no attendees! Not even the regulars. Gads. Is this what almost a month of unending rain will do to a town?

Then, three delightful women showed up, strangers to each other, and only one a repeat to us. We cosied up into a lovely corner with our crustless sandwiches, soup & sherry -- and started to talk.

I led them through my discussion -- it went exactly as I'd hoped. Every example I gave elicited another author, an experience, an opinion. We debated the present state of feminism, discussed steps to continue to inspire both women and men to be whole human beings, and just generally had a lovely time. We came up for air to discover it was 10 p.m., an hour after our scheduled end time.

A great evening.

But the truest moment of the night came to me when I went to the washroom. In the middle stall, some inconsiderate cow had peed all over the seat. Damn seat pee-ers!

Yes, feminism in the 'West' (west of what?) seems redundant now. On the surface, a woman has as much equality as she can grab for herself. Some problems still exist -- don't get me started on fashion trends for women! -- but feminism as a movement seems to be dead.

But as long as women continue to treat each other with so little respect, the need for a feminist movement will not die out.

Lori

Morning musings

Here's a short entry by Metro a couple of days ago. Very Dr. Seuss-esque, and rather absurd. As is his previous post on the subject...enjoy them.

Then read his latest post about the absurdities of Canadian government. I don't know which is worse, the fact that we have no real choice in this next (far-too-early) election, or the idea that so few people will actually turn out to vote, as per usual.

With all the blood shed around the world for the right to vote, the fact that so many Canadians don't is incredibly disturbing.

Voting on Monday. I still have a few days to make up my mind.

Lori

Mention "Apple" or "iPod" in a post....

...and you get on every search engine. What is it about that company? So proprietary about their product/image that it rubs off on the consumers...

I got read by some Apple fan, who left a comment:

Anonymous said...

(Visit my friends and upload all of their music...ooooh...)

i love it when people justify not using an ipod (or complain about using an ipod) because Apple makes it harder to steal music.

nice.

I live it when people leave snarky comments anonymously. Or read one sentence in 10 (in parentheses no less, and with a silly "ooooh...") and take that as the primary meaning.

• Did I mention that my Archos thingamabob also voice records? (Cool.)
• Did I mention that I can make playlists on the thing too? (Something to do other than just look at it when listening, wishing I could do something with it....oh, sort of like an iPod) [Oh, I'm gonna get into trouble!]
• Did I mention that it took almost 4 hours to put the support software for the iPod on my PC? It was like dueling banjos. With my unit, I could be anywhere away from my computer (traveling, at work) and be able to plug it in to any Mac or PC and actually use it as a portable hard drive with no extra software or preparation.
  

But can I just rant for a second about these righteous people who assume that everyone, but them, is stealing music left, right, and centre? Show of hands, folks, how many CDs (or tapes, before CDs came into being) have made a CD for a friend, or had a friend give you one they made?

Did you know that record companies view that as stealing? Here's an article commenting on the Mac point of view, from 2001. Here are the Recording Industry Association of America's official definitions of piracy (with a bit of fear-mongering "we're coming to get you" attitude).

Oh, I've tried to download music (gasp!) illegally, but I'm not good at it: I already own the music I want to listen to. I end up with a Beatles tune....Oh, right. And a couple of Eminem tunes to find out if I like him enough to actually buy an album. (I have yet to listen to them.)

Metro and I bought a Napster 3-month unlimited membership over Christmas (we were buying them for the kids we knew)....I'm a little nervous about using it -- will I find enough that interests me to download?

Especially since we have a full rack of Metro's old cassettes sitting around, and:

• My new unit records in-line, with a very simple interface that even allows me to create a new recording for each song on a cassette (and it came with the correct cord)

So, Anonymous, thank you for the blog topic. And next time, take some responsibility for your words.

Lori

I just couldn't do it...

I tried to become part of the iPod generation...Metro got a 30GB Video iPod as a Christmas gift from his boss (yeah...it's a good company, and not just for the seasonal swag), and promptly gave it to me. [And people wonder why I'm marrying this guy!**]

My buddy, who now works for Apple because of a company buy-out, was thrilled, and sent me some fun links, including "50 Fun Things To Do With Your iPod". Okay. Cool. I've normally rebelled against being like everyone else, and there's something about an iPod that really makes you like everyone else...other iPod users (and muggers) recognize the tell-tale white earbuds...But I was okay with that.

Then, before the novelty could wear off, I realized the battery life was nowhere up to the advertised (and tested) 14+ hours of audio (with no stopping, re-starting, skipping, etc.). I got 5 hours on my test. Hmm.

Was it me? I've got bad luck with portable audio units. So we returned it, and got a gift card with the full balance, 'cause they were out of the iPods, post-Boxing Day sales.

Then I started having second thoughts. "Am I really an iPod person?" I did a bit of research, and heard about the Archos 20GB unit. I'm no techno-geek, but I do like to see inside my stuff a bit. I had been a little uncomfortable with the iPod interface, lack of buttons, and single-functionality. And Apple's "only iTunes" policy.

My little Archos 402 (yup, I bought it) has a few things that make it better suited to me:

• I can navigate around inside of it (and make playlists on the unit itself, instead of on my computer).
• It doesn't need any software to connect to any computer. I could connect to any computer, and access files. (Visit my friends and upload all of their music...ooooh...)
• It charges in a plug...not in a USB port. (Some guy on a discussion board complained about this aspect of the unit, compared to an iPod...but that doesn't make sense. Aren't you usually closer to a plug at any given time than to a USB port?)
• It comes with all of the wires/connectors you could possibly need (okay, so no car adapter -- big whoop) without having to buy them extra.
  
• Lastly, and the most importantly, it just saved me over $150...it comes with an adapter to plug my digital camera into it and upload photos. I now don't need to buy a bigger memory card for my camera for when Metro and I go on our honeymoon.

Ah...I'm off to play now.

Lori

(**No one, by the way, wonders why I'm marrying him. Everyone heartily approves.)

Bilbo's little house in the hill

You may have seen this from a variety of sources (I found it while browsing Boing Boing).... some people just have too much time on their hands.

And I applaud them for it. This tiny Bad End is utterly lovely. Check it out.

Lori

Oh, my...

Check out PartiallyClips: A Webcomic for Grownups.

Lately, I've been busy on my biggest project to-date: my own wedding. Interesting experience, having full control over all of the details.

For example: the caterer (a friend of a friend), the venue (a nice local spot), and the band (our favourite local group!)....

Lori

Saturday morning fun

I have nothing really to say about this, it's just fun. Check it out.

And while the Gender Genie has a bit more intellectual heft to it, it is still fun to play with.

Finally, take a quick look at this....

Now, go out and enjoy the day!

Lori

More on cell phones

From an interesting article on cellphone mis-use:

"You wouldn't anticipate being on an escalator and expecting somebody behind you to have a camera phone or [a camera] in their shoe or in their bag and placing it under your skirt, then placing the picture on the Internet," says state Rep. Mary Ann R. Dailey, R-Montgomery, the state bill's sponsor. "That's unconscionable behavior. It's an unfortunate thing that in this society we have to create laws to prevent this type of bad behavior."

Reminded me of what a professor once pointed out in a class, on the difference between Confucianism and Taoism. Essentially, Confucianism is for the young, seeking guidance in life. Taoism is for the old, seeking meaning. But both disciplines grew up under the same culture, and Taoism was critical of Confucianism's rules for life (from the Tao Te Ching):

When the great Tao is forgotten,
goodness and piety appear.
When the body's intelligence declines,
cleverness and knowledge step forth.
When there is no peace in the family,
filial piety begins.
When the country falls into chaos,
patriotism is born.
[translator, S. Mitchell]

Every time I hear of someone recommending a rule, by-law, or law to cover some aspect of human behaviour, I think of this, the political closing of the gate once the cows have already gone.

Lori

"My tattoo means WHAT?!?"

Just found a new blog...and it is the funniest, most relevant one I've seen to-date (sorry Metro, Nag, Cold Desert, Media Addict, Terminal City chick -- you folks are great, and good friends, but this Tian is a guy who appreciates the absurd!).

Of course, 'relevant' to me means that his blog is

1. absurd
2. language-related
3. something I've often wondered about
   

What are people thinking when they get a tattoo with Chinese characters?!?

Or even a trendy lower back tattoo (follow the link, watch the video!): "Oh, look at me! A sexy individualist with a tattoo like everyone else!" Definitely one of my pet peeves...How glad am I that the fashion trend when I was young was ultra-tight jeans and leg warmers -- No laser treatment necessary to leave my fashion mistakes behind.

I'm going to go back and read some more on tattooing foolishness!

Merry Christmas (if it is relevant to you!)

Lori

A cellphone rant

In the past, cellphones have annoyed me, irked me, enraged me...but in March of this year I was in a terrible rush of the last week before a festival I was producing, and I had to get a cellphone -- it was either that or sit next to a pay phone with a pile of quarters while I was away from my home phone, and I had to be out, doing things for the festival. So I bought a pay-as-you-go phone, and spent hours on it that week.

Then, I discovered the slippery slope [isn't it crazy that someone's found the time to write a Wikipedia article on just about everything?!?] that is cellphone usage. "Okay," I thought to myself, "I'll hang on to this phone, and we'll keep it in the car to use in emergencies."

Then I called Metro one day at work (his job gave him a cellphone to stay in touch while at work), and we arranged something rather important. Then I went tutoring, and called him to come pick me up on his way home from work. Then...I put more money on the phone.

Then, in May, I was recruited as a friend's campaign manager for the recent provincial election, and I racked up more hours (and money) on the phone.

So, I've recently bitten the bullet, and bought into a plan...a plan! Gads.

And while I may be a cellphone newbie, my friend, who I will call Ann, is newer still. Today, I'm going to give her my 'old' pay-as-you-go phone, for her and her husband to use just between them, so that one of them has a phone when they are meeting up. He is far more leery of it than she is...I'd say he's the smart one on this. [Actually, he's the smart one of the pair, he saw the wisdom in marrying this woman, in not letting her get away!]

They're in trouble.

But, then, so is all of society.

Cellphone usage has made us all ruder, lazier, more dangerous, and more obnoxious. We talk on the phone when we are with someone else. We don't make precise arrangements to meet, and don't worry about being late, because: "Oh, I'll just call you on your cell." We drive with them stuck to our ears (my Japanese friend was shocked that it wasn't illegal), although I'm still at the stage (luckily) where I'll answer the phone to say "I'm driving, I'll call you back." And we talk on the phone in public places about not-so-public things, and annoy others with our blather.

And now I've started to IM with my colleague about projects we're working on, sometimes, albeit jokingly, when we're in the same office. Is this another place to be wary?

Check out this quicktime video on that subject.

Lori

Word Geek x 2

I'm not alone....I'm currently on the phone with a friend and he and I are totally geeking out on the Color Code: a color portrait of the English Language. Go there, and enjoy it. (Thanks to anonymous who left the link in my comment section!)

Lori

Word Geek

Why does stuff like this excite me? It doesn't do anything...there's no real practical application for it...

Reminds me of the Visual Thesaurus. It's been around for years, and is so popular that one can't spend time just being in it without paying (but you can still browse briefly). It has a more obvious application, but there's the danger of going to it to look for a word, but getting lost in the patterns, in the search. Would make a great gift for the word-junkies on your list (hint, hint!)

Bought a new notebook yesterday, to investigate poetry a bit more deeply. I want to write out the bits that intrigue me, and maybe even work on some of my own. A line that has held my interest for awhile is from a poem by Seamus Heaney (not to be missed: It's available online with an audio file of him reading):

I remembered her head bent towards my head,

Her breath in mine, our fluent dipping knives--

According to Wordcount, the overall use of the word fluent is ranked at 13919, dipping at 15457, and knives at 9339. We write about sharp edges more than we talk about the flowing nature of speech.

I'll leave you with a line (utterly out of context) from "To the Days" by Adrienne Rich:

A typewriter's torrent, suddenly still.
Blue soaking through fog, two dragonflies wheeling.
Acceptable levels of cruelty, steadily rising.
Whatever you bring in your hands, I need to see.

Lori

Fog, and a walk

Metro and I went for a drive and a walk yesterday -- and I got him to stop and drive back a block or two so that I could catch this picture.









And the park we went to in the late afternoon (about 4 p.m. here in frigid Canada), had some beautiful light.


And the river was glorious (the posts in the water are from an old log dump...not in use for the last 40 or 50 years).






I do have a photo site, but to be honest, I don't like the utter blackness of the background. I'm going to establish a page on Flickr: here's the URL, but there's no pictures there yet!

Lori

But some of them seem useful!

This is the Grandiloquent Dictionary, the:

...result of an ongoing project to collect and distribute the most obscure and rare words in the English language.

But, really, even on the first page ('A' words), there are some useful ones.

Haven't we all met an:

aeolist

A pompous windy bore who pretends to have inspiration

or aren't we often guilty of:

abligurition

Excessive spending on food and drink

I don't dare go on, my friends think me pompous enough already!

Lori

Repetition

I like photography (if you've been to my not-often-updated photo site, you'll know that), but what I really like is repetitive patterns.

In humour, repetition is funny. In nature, repetition is fascinating. In art, repetition can be beautiful (as in this painting by my friend, Won Seok Lim).


And in writing, repetition is rhetorical...

So, imagine my delight when I found this site. "Exactitudes" -- collections of people in more or less the same pose.

Lovely.

Speaking of photography, and beauty, also check out Their Circular Life....and watch the movement of light (and people) over the course of a day.

Lori

Okay -- this is a useful thing!

Those of you who are using antiquated programs...

or who don't want to spend the hundreds on MS Office (to get Excel & PowerPoint)...

or Adobe (but you want the option to pdf your files once in awhile)....

Let me hear you, if you fit that description, yell "Yeah!"

"Yeah!"

Okay folks...have you heard of the ThinkFree Corporation? "A revolutionary free service that lets you create, access, and edit...within a web browser."

Two words I like: free and web. I've tried it -- and it lives up to the hype.

So far.

Check it out, and tell me what the catch is....'cause, as always, I think it's too good to be true.

Lori

Balm of Good Service

I know I've posted on this before...but really, what is really fabulous service? Is it merely politeness?

No.

(Illustrative anecdote) Metro and I went to a possible wedding venue a couple of weeks ago...and it was perfect in every way: a heritage manor near our home. A lovely room for the actual ceremony. A beautifully furnished room for the bride to get ready in. A park across the street to take a couple of pictures. A great big room downstairs with a bar for the 'apres' party, with a dance floor and a place for the band. Pricey, but not over-the-top, sell-your-first-born-to-pay (seriously, take a look at the pictures).

We had an appointment for a tour...she showed us the place...took us to a room on the second floor to talk about menus and money -- then left us there. "Okay, good-bye," and she walked away, went back to her office down the hall.

What? Can't walk us downstairs and see us to the door? Did you write us off -- assume that we're not a good prospect, that we wouldn't actually pay to have our wedding at this place?

She was polite, but there was something lacking.

I think what was lacking was an attitude of consanguinity.

Rachel, the woman at Birks who sold us our wedding rings today, treated me as an equal the moment I walked into the store...dressed in my normal casual attire.

Jim, my real estate agent from a few years ago (when I bought my condo), was the same. I had watched a new condo building go up, and went in to view the suites, just like any local looky-loo. A slob in a jeans and t-shirt. But I got hit by the bug, and a couple of weeks later, I was calling him up to see some places (with my excited mother in tow). I bought a place, and when those little ubiquitous notepads of his cross my path, I proudly say: "Hey, that's my real estate agent. He's great."

Am I right? We can all describe poor service -- but what is the fabulous variety? Help me out here!

Next time, I will avoid blogging about a certain rap star wanting to make a bright blue, larger-than-life, waterproof, "motorized version" of himself...(I'm not sure about the larger-than-life aspect, just sounded good) I guess he wants to appear sensitive and hip.

Gads. Now that's absurd.

Lori

Eating Dinner Out

Last night I was working late. As I was leaving the office (I'm helping out at one of the most innovative social activist organizations in North America -- Pivot Legal Society. They're having their annual charity auction on Monday, andI'm doing what I can to help with the production.), I was hungry. The most convenient place to get something to eat was an overpriced brew pub, called Steamworks.

Now, I'm going to pause here and clarify some aspects of dining out in Canada (and the USA), because I know some people who read this are from different parts of the world.

Point #1
A brew pub is a restaurant/bar that actually makes its own beer. Often quite tasty beer, in fact.

Point #2
Tipping in pubs/restaurants is something that is taken for granted here, and is an annoyance, especially if you've had a few of those beers....Essentially, restaurant owners can pay their staff low wages because they know that the customers will leave 10% to 20% of the total bill, extra, for the server. And of course, the customer is already paying for the food, which includes the profit margin for the restaurant owner. The server is dependent on the tips, because it is the difference between a minimum wage and a liveable wage. Let's see, who wins in this scenario? Pause, think for a moment....Ah yes. The restaurant owner. The customer pays for the food, and helps pay for the staff. [Don't get me started.]

Point #3
Many people use their bank cards to pay for things instead of carrying cash, or using a credit card. It doesn't take any longer for that to be processed than it does a credit card, and it costs the customer nothing (or very little, depending on the bank plan you have). It costs the business a little bit, like a credit card: I think up to 4% on the amount. Generally, for small businesses it can be expensive, so I try to use cash. For larger businesses, well, it's part of the cost of doing business.

Point #4
Bank machines are everywhere, and nowadays, not only at banks. Businesses can now get a bank machine in their establishment that charges the user $1.50 to $2 to use (and the business gets a big chunk of that). Bars and restaurants sometimes do it -- mostly bars. It's tacky. People hate them, because it costs them that extra amount.

So, back to my story.

I had an overpriced salad and a pint of beer at this restaurant, and went to pay with my bank card. My bill was $19.04 (oh yeah, that includes 14.5% tax as well!). The server (a lovely woman) smiles apologetically and tells me that they don't take bank cards, but that I can use the machine downstairs to take out some money. This annoys me, so I go and take out $20 -- no, sorry, $22 (paying the restaurant that extra 10% on my bill!).

I asked to speak to the manager, 'cause I was pissed. His answer: "We're too big to be able to accept bank cards." Too big?!? McDonald's takes bank cards! Many bigger and better places take bank cards. And if Steamworks gets so many people using bank cards, why isn't there a line up at the machine?

Of course, at the time, I was too angry to point out these rational arguments to his ridiculous claim, so I just didn't tip the server. I told her (and the manager) that the restaurant owed her the 10% I would have left for her.

Did I leave in a huff? Yes. Do I feel bad about it? Yes. She was very friendly, and she'll never get a raise from that skinflint restaurant, much less the $2.

Will I go back there? Ah, that's the really ridiculous thing...I probably will.

Lori

"Big 'i' or little 'i'?"

Last night, Metro and I were having a discussion about what may/might/could happen after death ("Good grief! Why?!?" I hear you ask. As always, it was prompted by one of those "What would you do if you knew you only had X amount of time to live?" questions asked of both of us in the last couple of days...)

This of course led to a discussion of what annoys me about Atheism/Skepticism -- not that atheists don't believe in a god (I'm with them on that), but that they so strongly don't believe. Ain't that a belief? (Oh, I'm simplifying this for the sake of the blog, not to mention the fun of being contentious...I'm sure I'll catch some flack for it.)

Personally, I'm agnostic (yes, I know it means that I'm unable to make a decision!). I believe that there are forces/energies in the universe we don't understand, and probably never will, but I do not believe that there is any personality/intelligent design involved.

Do not get 'intelligent design' confused with "Intelligent Design" (Gads, don't get me started. Just suffice to say I'm glad I don't live in the States, and if you want intelligent contradiction, visit Pharyngula, a great blogging scientist that enjoys ripping silly arguments to shreds.)

Which brings me to a page -- making fun of the very real (and scary) (and as of May this year, unconstitutional) practice in Alabama of putting evolution 'disclaimers' in textbooks.

Lori

Bilingual Jokes

A Japanese woman I've been working with has fabulous English. So good, in fact, that she's utterly comfortable making fun of her pronunciation.

Yesterday, as I was leaving work, I said: "Bye, folks!"

Her response? "Bye, spoon!"

I giggled all the way home.

Lori

No man is an island...

I've been reading Lt-Gen Romeo Dallaire's award-winning book, Shake Hands with the Devil: The Failure of Humanity in Rwanda...and it is truly a gripping book. I read the first half of Dallaire's account of the lead up to April 7, 1994 with a sense of impending doom, but I was following it, enjoying it--if one can enjoy a blow-by-blow description of how the UN & the world were neither willing nor able to supply the UNAMIR mission with enough of anything. [He calculated that if his UNAMIR troops had been allowed to open fire to protect themselves or civilians, each armed personnel had enough ammunition to sustain a 3 minute firefight. They didn't have paper or pencils to run their operation, nor more than three days rations on hand at any time.]

Then reading it this morning, I almost burst into tears on the train to work. I was distressed. I wandered out into the windy, rainy morning, and stopped for a cup of coffee. I walked to work. I was briefly annoyed by the pushy people paid to hand out trashy free daily newspapers that litter the streets, transit, & coffee shops. I said, "sorry, no" to a guy asking for spare change.

Suddenly, my life was back to normal.

Oh, I understand about the why and the how of this mechanism we all have to protect ourselves from that which we can't handle...my question is: How does one maintain the care & concern needed to be an activist?

Lori

Ah...nature!

I love Autumn. Bright, crisp days. Jacket weather.

And trips to the Reifel Bird Sanctuary, where I can 'do my Francis of Asisi thing' as Metro calls it ('tis tricky taking a picture of a chickadee in one's own hand, I'll have you know!)





The only absurd thing to note is the family name of Mr. George C. Reifel that christens this wonderful migratory bird sanctuary...a reminder of the canoes with hunters waiting out beyond the boundaries to shoot down some of the lovely snow geese that fly in every year at this time.



Lori

...and they actually attended!

The time has come for the Annals of Improbably Research to award their annual IG Nobel Prizes.

Here are the winners...including the researcher and author of the paper "Pressures Produced when Penguins Pooh--Calculations on Avian Defaecation" (I wish this were a joke...but 'scientists' receive grant money for stuff like this!)

There is really nothing more to say.

Lori

My last post, courtesy of The Dialiectizer: the Redneck 'dialect'. (You can choose to 'translate' a webpage into a number of dialects, including 'Elmer Fudd', Jive, or 'Moron'. Perpetuating stereotypes? No kidding. Absurd? Of course.)

My last post, courtesy of The Dialiectizer: the Redneck 'dialect'. (You can choose to 'translate' a webpage into a number of dialects, including 'Elmer Fudd', Jive, or 'Moron'. Perpetuating stereotypes? No kidding. Absurd? Of course.)

"Bein' Weird Isn't 'Nuff"

When ah was in unyversity, ah wo'e this hyar button (o' at least th' vahshun fum th' late 80s):

An' fella, was ah proud of mahse'f! Fry mah hide! ah figgerd ah needed t'advahtise thet ah was diffrunt, odd, unusual, ah reckon...but, at th' same time, claimin' thet ah was mo'e than jest th' avahage early-20s iconoclast.

But I've discovahed thet th' lapel button is not necessary -- varmints will talk th' "ah's weirder/wonnerfuller/wo'thier than thou" talk wifout th' pin, as enny fool kin plainly see. It don't matter their shtick, they'll talk it.

They. Th' varmints whose cornvahsashun ah lissen t'fo' a bit, then git tired of. "Show me yer walkin' th' walk," ah's hankerin' t'say t'them, dawgone it.

Mebbe I'll change mah own ways befo'e someone says it t'me.

Lo'i

"Being Weird Isn't Enough"

When I was in university, I wore this button (or at least the version from the late 80s):

And boy, was I proud of myself! I figured I needed to advertise that I was different, odd, unusual...but, at the same time, claiming that I was more than just the average early-20s iconoclast.

But I've discovered that the lapel button is not necessary -- people will talk the "I'm weirder/wonderfuller/worthier than thou" talk without the pin. It doesn't matter their shtick, they'll talk it.

They. The people whose conversation I listen to for a bit, then get tired of. "Show me you're walking the walk," I want to say to them.

Maybe I'll change my own ways before someone says it to me.

Lori

Insane or Brilliant?

What do you think of this -- the Time Travel Fund?

Well....I'm more of a single-time-line kind of girl, you know, more of a 12 Monkeys view of time travel (where if you've gone to the past, then you were already there), than, say, the Time Cop style (where if you travel back, what you do affects the future, essentially creating branches of alternate futures).

So, if I'm right -- and I know I am! -- I know that I didn't invest any money in this time travel fund, as I would already have the money, and a note to myself to remember to invest at some point in the future (A method used to great advantage in Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure.)

Or, perhaps that is how they plan to make their profit? If I don't invest now, on the above reasoning, then the fact that I do invest sometime in the future means that they hold my money secretly until I actually make the investment...maybe they hope that people will forget to to do it?

Ah, paradox.

Lori

What does service mean to you?

I admit, I'm a service junkie. I'm the type that will embarrass friends and family with questions like: "Excuse me, are we in anybody's section?" If I have to tip in this country, then I expect a basic minimum of service...If I don't get it, I talk to the manager. If the service is decent, I leave an average tip. Good service gets a slightly better tip. Fabulous service in a restaurant or bar that I am likely to return to (more likely to happen of course, if I get great service) earns a bigger tip.

Birks is a jewelry store with a well-deserved reputation for brilliant service. Visit them for a browse and luxuriate in the balm that is TRUE meaning of service. I was there to price wedding rings, and Rachel (in the ring section) offered me a glass of water or a cup of coffee.

"Nice," I thought to myself, thinking of a Styrofoam cup of a Tim Horton's equivalent. "Oh, I would actually love a cup of coffee," I answered her.

"Regular, cappuccino, or a latte?" She laughed with me at my surprise...and went off to get me a cappuccino. She comes back with a lovely coffee cup and saucer -- no Styrofoam in sight.

I know how Holly Golightly felt about Tiffany's.

Lori