Thursday, January 11, 2007

I know I promised, but...

...this is just too absurd to pass up.

In the midst of my cat's woes (and my cat woes), Metro thought he'd be helpful, and sign me up to a cat-related newsletter.

The first one wasn't too bad. "Does your cat have nine lives?":
I asked one of our writers to do a little research and tell us about this ancient proverb.
Okay. Cool.

Yesterday, I got another: "Can you read your cat's mind?"

"Okay. A cat psychology thing," I thought to myself. But then I went to the site and found:
Step 1. Believe in your psychic ability.
"Warning! Warning!" My bs-detector went off like a claxon.

Then there was the one this morning: "What's your cat's sign?"




Metro said...

Using my psychic ability, I am autokeying--that is, I am directing the cats' thoughts through my fingers to the keyboard:

EAT. Eat. Tuna. Eat EAT Eat cheese. Cheese Tuna eat.

LICK CROTCH VIGOROUSLY. Lick lick lick lick lick lick lick lick lick lick lick.



Sleep ...

Oh--sorry. Must have been picking up psychic interference from the next commentor.

Anonymous said...

Wow, that is truly amazing! How do you do it?


PJ said...

If you could read your cats' minds, you wouldn't need to ask them what their signs are.

Lori said...

PJ -- Exactly! What are they thinking?!?

Metro & IH -- nuts, the two of you.


raincoaster said...

Metro, I thought you said you were gonna post the cat's thoughts? We're still waiting!

PS: right now I'm in a house that has an etiquette book for cats, a "how to serve your cat better" (I'm thinking with a good Beaujolais) and every single one of the cards they got for Christmas has a cat on it except for the one I gave them, which has a drunken Santa. They probably WRITE that newsletter.

Metro said...

Ah--see. I knew it was from one of the commentors. Nice to see you here, Raincoaster.